Possible Origin: Wednesday, November 10, 1999

Something is wrong with my television.  The channels are messed up.  What should be ESPN (channel 56) is Nickelodeon (channel 24).  The History Channel (channel 15) is CNN (channel 67).  And it changes.  Channel 36 will be MSNBC, then switch to UPN, and later become CBS. 

What's going to be on when I change channels is a gamble. 

I have to be careful because I might not be able to get back.  


Growing up, my parents, believing in frugality and the importance of the book, limited our cable package to a mere fifteen channels. A full third of those were dedicated to weather, public broadcasting and other unwatchable programming. Our house was network only.

When I got my own place, I opted for a full, one hundred and twenty six channel extravaganza: Comedy Central, Bravo, MTV, TBS, Showtime, HBO, The Independent Movie Channel.  I watch anything.  Anything with people talking.  Any movie, any sitcom, any commercial, any sporting event.  I turn it on when I come home and turn it off when I go to bed.  I can't listen to recorded music.  It's just people singing to themselves in closed rooms. 

Nothing should be wrong.  Everything is correctly connected.